CoffeeBeer >> Double Shot Buzz >> Copa Caffé

Since things have opened up again post-lockdowns, there have been quite a few new coffee venues sprouting up in Sheffield, some of which I intend to visit at some point. At the moment, though, even though my work schedule is now reduced, there are so many other things I need to get done that it just feels like time, and that crazy thing called Life, are just whooshing by, seemingly through a wormhole.

So I was quite surprised to accidentally come across a new coffee cafe. Occasionally I work at the campus near Ecclesall Road, and one afternoon I decided I needed to go down to Caffe Nero for a badly needed dose of caffeine. I was confused as I approached where Nero used to be, because it had been replaced by a brand new cafe.

Although it was new to me, Copa Caffé actually opened in the spring of 2021. The name "Copa" apparently comes from the word copacetic, with of course "caff&eacte;" referring to, well, it's pretty obvious. As I stood at the counter waiting for my single macchiato, I was very drawn to the allure of the feta and spinach pastry on the top of the counter that kept beckoning sexually to me. "I just had lunch so I'm not hungry," I told myself, "and I don't need to buy it for later, because we've got plenty of food at home." But it was very tempting, I must admit.

After chatting a bit with the baristas, I took my macchiato down the street back to my job, taking a preliminary sip as I walked. Hmm, not bad, I thought. It wasn't until I was seated at work and proceeded to drink it that I realised it was getting better and better with each sip. By the time I got to the bottom of the cup, I was pretty much in ecstasy and wishing there were more. And this was just a simple single macchiato!

Copa uses Cupper's Choice coffee, roasted in Sheffield and sourced directly from Rwanda and other countries. The growers visit the countries directly to make sure that the coffee is ethically grown. The blend Copa uses is a light-to-medium roast, but, you know, it's quite good. I really like it. It's a nice change for an espresso.

A few weeks later I stopped back in for a macchiato, and I noticed that they now have a full breakfast and lunch menu available. Once again, my coffee was really good, especially as I got to the last few sips back at my job. It sneaks up on you.

Copa Coffee also offers an interesting assortment of sandwiches in the fridge case, and they make smoothies and milkshakes as well. And they offer lots of sweet pastries as well, for those who like that sort of thing. All baked items are vegan and gluten free, and they use several local Sheffield bakeries including Nevertheless Cakes in Meersbrook and the Suited Baker in Castlebeck.

The decor of the cafe has a bit more of a darker evening feel to it than Caffe Nero did. They're hoping to sell draught beers and wine at some point, and they're planning on opening a cocktail lounge just a few doors down. If this all happens, then Copa Caffé will be yet another proper CoffeeBeer venue. For now, it's definitely a great place to get an espresso. And that's music to my ears.

Speaking of music, I'm reminded of an email conversation from last year with my Bay Area friend:

When my partner sits in his chair in the morning drinking his first cup of coffee, he sometimes lets out a huge belch accompanied by a fart. Naturally, being mature adults, we usually follow this short gaseous duet with wails of laughter.

Since I minored in Music Composition at university, I'm tempted to compose a short orchestral piece featuring farts, belches, sneezes, coughs, and other bodily aural production. The orchestra that would perform this piece could feature a range of players adept at their own stylistic techniques: for sneezes, everything ranging from my dad's neighbourhood-shaking explosions to our former workmate's anaemic "Eh-CHOO!"s; farts ranging from my mother's "Walking Poots" that she would perform as she strode across the floor, to those plaintive small-animal wails that emerge, usually accompanied by a stomach growling, and also those stentorian fanfares that proudly announce "I HAVE GAS AND I'M NOT AFRAID TO SHOUT IT!!" The Cough Section could feature Throat Clearing, Dry Hackings, Productive Expulsion, and Emphasemic Wheezes, and in the percussion section we could have a Knuckle Cracker, a Knee Cracker, a Nose Whistle, a Coffee Slurper, and a Heavy Breather. Ahh, so many projects and so little time! I love the dulcet farts idea. But even if we could produce such sonorous resonance through the portal of our broad bronzed rectums, I imagine it would still be difficult to control the timing. So the concerto I'm hearing is played by a sort of spastic handbell ensemble.

I'm vaguely aware that there is formal music notation for percussion; does it encompass the range of percussive notes sounded by human orifices? While you are scoring your Concerto for Farts, Belches, Sneezes and Coughs, will the Italian lexicon provide all the subtleties of annotation you will need (would our former workmate's sneeze be pianissimo?), or will you have to coin your own? Fartissimo!